Tony the Tank

Yesterday after work I headed off to 24 hour fitness to get in my days workout. Seeing as my new apartment doesn't have a pool or gym, being built in 1926 and looking more like an office building, I was forced to join a club gym. First, I walk in and take my place on the elliptical machine, luckily getting the only one left. I am looking around, this club is packed as apparently right after work is the popular time to go. I'm not a big girl, and in 30 minutes, I counted only 5 people that were more overweight than myself. I was in Barbie land. I took it as motivation to be more fit and went about my business. 5:30 rolls around and there is an abdominal class (OH MY GOSH, the IT guy just farted VERY loud! I'm on the other side of the office. That's so sick) that I have been wanting to participate in. I go downstairs, take my place on the floor with my mat. I see that Tony is the instructor on the list outside. Little do I know that "Tony" is a giant built black man that should be in the military pushing those folks around. He walks in, tells us to get on our mats and start crunching. He explains the right way to do the sit ups and then says "GO". About 1 minute into this class I'm already thinking I might die. He says "only 8 more, come on!" So, I'm counting down in my head, painfully thinking I can complete these 8. Finally, down to one. Tony says, "KEEP GOING, YOU DIDN'T THINK YOU COULD STOP! GO GO GO" I'm in so much pain after 5 mintues of this, NON STOP that I start laughing out loud, uncontrollably. Luckily the Tank doesn't notice, though the people around me did and thought I was on crack to be laughing at this torture. After about 8 minutes of the class, we are instructed to turn over and lie on our stomachs. Then, to put our arms underneath our chest and raise off the ground, curling our feet so that our bodies are hovering parallel to the ground. This is probably the most painful thing you can do. He makes us stay there for a minute or so. I am hurting, probably really about to die this time, so I stick my butt up in the air a little, makes it a lot less painful, when Tony walks over and pushes my butt down, so that I am parallel again and yells (with an already loud microphone on him), "YOU DO NOT PUT YOUR BUTT IN THE AIR, THAT DOES NOT WORK YOUR ABS! COME ON NOW, DON'T BE A SISSY!" I didn't really give a crap at this moment. I looked around at the pain on the other people's faces who were in far better shape than myself, so I'm thinking I'm doing pretty damn good right now. Another guy next to me laid down for a minute, not to anyones surprise, there was Tony to pull on his shirt raising him off the ground and yelling at him not to be a sissy. Just about everyone in the class either had their butt raised or was on the floor for at least a few seconds, hoping not to be caught by the tank.
All and all, I think 1 month with this dude and I should be able to kick just about anyone's butt, and be in the best shape of my life. Mind you I'm just telling you about the 15 minute ab class. He also teaches an hour long step class. But that will be saved for another day. And, needless to say, I am in more pain this morning than I can ever recall being in.